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Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville), 1881-1975

"A Damsel in Distress"

He wears a bowler hat on the side of his head
and calls waitresses 'Mabel'. Answer 'yes' or 'no'. Will you marry
me?"
"But--But--how about--I mean, what about--I mean how about--?"
"Make up your mind what you do mean."
"The other fellow!" gasped George.
A musical laugh was wafted to him over the wire.
"What about him?"
"Well, what about him?" said George.
"Isn't a girl allowed to change her mind?" said Maud.
George yelped excitedly. Maud gave a cry.
"Don't sing!" she said. "You nearly made me deaf."
"Have you changed your mind?"
"Certainly I have!"
"And you really think--You really want--I mean, you really
want--You really think--"
"Don't be so incoherent!"
"Maud!"
"Well?"
"Will you marry me?"
"Of course I will."
"Gosh!"
"What did you say?"
"I said Gosh! And listen to me, when I say Gosh, I mean Gosh! Where
are you? I must see you. Where can we meet? I want to see you! For
Heaven's sake, tell me where you are. I want to see you! Where are
you? Where are you?"
"I'm downstairs."
"Where? Here at the 'Carlton'?"
"Here at the 'Carlton'!"
"Alone?"
"Quite alone.


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