I
procured it, and as it was in the house, and I did not anticipate
serious consequences, I could not withstand the strong temptation to
drink. I did drink, and so freely that the usual effect was produced.
How much I swallowed I cannot tell, but the quantity, judging from the
effects, must have been considerable.
Ten long weary days of suspense passed, at the end of which my wife and
her infant both died. Then came the terribly oppressive feeling that I
was forgotten of God, as well as abandoned by man. All the
consciousness of my dreadful situation pressed heavily, indeed, upon
me, and keenly as a sensitive mind could, did I feel the loss I had
experienced. I drank now to dispel my gloom, or to drown it in the
maddening cup. And soon was it whispered, from one to another, until
the whole town became aware of it, that my wife and child were lying
dead, and that I was drunk! But if ever I was cursed with the faculty
of thought, in all its intensity, it was then. And this was the
degraded condition of one who had been nursed in the lap of piety, and
whose infant tongue had been taught to utter a prayer against being led
into temptation.
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