Un, Hanner, you see we'll hev tu be savin,
Un whittle our store-bill down tu a shavin;
You can't go tu meetin in silks; I vum
You'll hev tu wear ging-um er stay tu hum."
But Hannah said sharply--"I won't though, I swum!"
And Hannah gazed wistfully on her Jo
As he rocked himself mournfully to and fro,
And then she looked thoughtfully into the fire,
While the sleet fell faster and the wind blew higher,
And Jo took a turn at the _Daily Liar_.
1890.
[Illustration: "THE KENTRY'S AGOIN', I GUESS, TO THE DOGS"]
PAT AND THE PIG
Old Deutchland's the country for sauerkraut and beer,
Old England's the land of roast beef and good cheer,
Auld Scotland's the mother of gristle and grit,
But Ireland, my boy, is the mother of wit.
Once Pat was indicted for stealing a pig,
And brought into court to the man in the wig.
The indictment was long and so lumbered with Latin
That Pat hardly knew what a pickle was Pat in;
But at last it was read to the end, and the wig
Said: "Pat, are you guilty of stealing the pig?"
Pat looked very wise, though a trifle forlorn,
And he asked of milord that the witness be sworn.
"Bless yer sowl," stammered Pat, "an' the day ye was born!
Faith how in the divil d'ye think Oi can tell
Till Oi hear the ividince?"
Pat reckoned well;
For the witness was sworn and the facts he revealed--
How Pat stole the piggy and how the pig squealed,
Whose piggy the pig was and what he was worth,
And the slits in his ears and his tail and--so forth;
But he never once said, 'in the county of Meath,'[CX]
So Pat he escaped by the skin of his teeth.
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