"
It made an awful hit with Uncle Peter to see me cough up those two
bones, but I said nothing and made good.
My wife called it a musicale, but to me it looked more like a fight.
With the help of Aunt Martha and Alice Grey, my wife arranged the
programme and kept it dark to surprise the rest of the family.
It was such a surprise to me that I felt like doing a glide to the
woodlands.
It was my second experience with a musicale, and this one cured me
all right.
You know I don't care much for society--especially when it breaks
into our bungalow and begins to scratch my furniture with its
high-heeled shoes. But just to please Peaches I promised to go in
the parlor and not be an insult to those present.
For awhile everybody sat around and sized up what everybody else
was wearing.
Then they gave each other the silent double-cross.
Presently my wife whispered to Miss Cleopatra Hungerschnitz,
whereupon that young lady giggled her way over to the piano and
began to knock its teeth out.
The way Cleopatra went after one of Beethoven's sonatas and slapped
its ears was pitiful.
Cleopatra learned to injure a piano at a conservatory of music, and
she could take a fugo by Victor Hugo and leave it for dead in about
thirty-two bars.
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