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Twain, Mark, 1835-1910

"Mark Twain's Speeches"


But I will not venture to advise this body, as I only venture to advise
bodies who are, not present.



MISTAKEN IDENTITY
ADDRESS AT THE ANNUAL "LADIES' DAY," PAPYRUS CLUB, BOSTON
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,--I am perfectly astonished--a-s-t-o-n-i-s-h-e-d
--ladies and gentlemen--astonished at the way history repeats itself.
I find myself situated at this moment exactly and precisely as I was once
before, years ago, to a jot, to a tittle--to a very hair. There isn't a
shade of difference. It is the most astonishing coincidence that ever
--but wait. I will tell you the former instance, and then you will see
it for yourself. Years ago I arrived one day at Salamanca, New York,
eastward bound; must change cars there and take the sleeper train. There
were crowds of people there, and they were swarming into the long sleeper
train and packing it full, and it was a perfect purgatory of dust and
confusion and gritting of teeth and soft, sweet, and low profanity.
I asked the young man in the ticket-office if I could have a
sleeping-section, and he answered "No," with a snarl that shrivelled me
up like burned leather.


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