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Twain, Mark, 1835-1910

"Mark Twain's Speeches"

" No doubt many a
person was misled by those sentences joined together in that unkind way.
I have no doubt my character has suffered from it. I suppose I ought to
defend my character, but how can I defend it? I can say here and now
--and anybody can see by my face that I am sincere, that I speak the truth
--that I have never seen that Cup. I have not got the Cup--I did not have
a chance to get it. I have always had a good character in that way. I
have hardly ever stolen anything, and if I did steal anything I had
discretion enough to know about the value of it first. I do not steal
things that are likely to get myself into trouble. I do not think any of
us do that. I know we all take things--that is to be expected--but
really, I have never taken anything, certainly in England, that amounts
to any great thing. I do confess that when I was here seven years ago I
stole a hat, but that did not amount to anything. It was not a good hat,
and was only a clergyman's hat, anyway.
I was at a luncheon party, and Archdeacon Wilberforce was there also. I
dare say he is Archdeacon now--he was a canon then--and he was serving in
the Westminster battery, if that is the proper term--I do not know, as
you mix military and ecclesiastical things together so much.


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