Naturally, I don't want to earn my living by it any more, but
whether I sing or not doesn't matter. And even as the words are in my
mouth I try to imagine myself not singing any more, and I can't. It's
become part of me, and while I blush to think of what I said to Hermann,
I wonder whether it's not true."
She came and sat down by him again.
"I believe you have got enough artistic instinct to understand that,
Michael," she said, "and to know what a tremendous help it is to one's
art to be a professional, and to be judged seriously. I suppose that,
ideally, if one loves music as I do one ought to be able to do one's
very best, whether one is singing professionally or not, but it
is hardly possible. Why, the whole difference between amateurs and
professionals is that amateurs sing charmingly and professionals just
sing. Only they sing as well as they possibly can, not only because they
love it, but because if they don't they will be dropped on to, and if
they continue not singing their best, will lose their place which they
have so hardly won. I can see myself, perhaps, not singing at all,
literally never opening my lips in song again, but I can't see myself
coming down to the Drill Hall at Brixton, extremely beautifully
dressed, with rows of pearls, and arriving rather late, and just singing
charmingly.
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