The negociator
came prepared to enforce his proposal with all his
art; but, finding that I caught his offer with the
eagerness of necessity, he grew cold and languid;
"he had mentioned it out of kindness; he would
try to serve me: Mr. Squeeze was an honest man,
but extremely cautious." In three days he came
to tell me, that his endeavours had been ineffectual,
Mr. Squeeze having no good opinion of my
life; but that there was one expedient remaining:
Mrs. Squeeze could influence her husband, and
her good will might be gained by a compliment.
I waited that afternoon on Mrs. Squeeze, and
poured out before her the flatteries which usually
gain access to rank and beauty: I did not then
know, that there are places in which the only
compliment is a bribe. Having yet credit with a
jeweller, I afterwards procured a ring of thirty guineas,
which I humbly presented, and was soon admitted
to a treaty with Mr. Squeeze. He appeared peevish
and backward, and my old friend whispered me,
that he would never make a dry bargain: I therefore
invited him to a tavern. Nine times we met on
the affair; nine times I paid four pounds for the
supper and claret; and nine guineas I gave the
agent for good offices.
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