Aw once knew a varry
absent minded chap; he wur allus dooin' some sooart o' wrang heeaded
tricks. Aw' remember once we'd booath to sleep i' one bed, an aw gate
in fust, an' when aw luk'd to see if he wor commin', aw'm blow'd! if
he hadn't put his cloas into bed an hung hissen ovver th' cheer back.
Awm sure aw connot tell where all this marchin' is likely to lead us
to at last, but aw hooap we shall be all reight, for aw do think
ther's plenty o' room to mend even yet, but the deuce on it is,'
ther's soa monny different notions abaat what is reight wol aw'm
flamigaster'd amang it. Some say drink is the besetting sin; another
says 'bacca is man's ruination. One says we're all goin' to the devil
becoss we goa to church, an' another says we'st niver goa to heaven if
we goa to th' chapel, but aw dooant let ony o' them things bother me.
'At ther is a deeal o' sin i'th' world aw dooant deny, an', aw think
ther is one 'at just bears th' same relation to other sins as a split
ring bears to a bunch o' keys; it's one 'at all t'other things on: an'
that's _selfishness_, an we've all sadly too mich o' that. We follow
that "number one" doctrine sadly too mich,--iverybody seems bent o'
gettin, but ther's varry few think o' givin'--(unless its advice,
ther's any on 'em ready enuff to give that; but if advice wor stuff
'at they could buy potatoes wi', ther' wodn't be as mich o' that
knockin' abaat for nowt as ther' is).
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